Hi, it's 1AM now and Im supposed to wake up at 5AM and head back to KKB to work. But the thing is, I couldn't sleep, or to be precise, I don't want to sleep. Coz if I sleep, the moment I wake up will be the time when I have to leave my house and go to that workplace that I feel reluctant to go every working day. And this time round, I wouldn't come back home for at least 2 weeks, at most 3 weeks. Haih, I'm laughing at my 3-months-ago-self who naively chose KKB because I wanted to stay outside of home, to gain serenity, to learn independence. Now I kind of regretted it more than ever. Because I have to work weekend shifts and night shifts continuously for 3 weekends, and all that more sad when I have to go back to an empty house after the shifts. Have to hand wash clothes myself some more T. T

Can't imagine how those people who studied overseas survived the loneliness. Actually I think I wasn't this homesick when I was studying at IMU. That time when I had to stay back for 2 weeks. I guess it started since I started working at hospital. The feeling of wanting to be around family. Coz I feel time passes so fast. I'm already 25. Sis are also grown ups now. We all left home and now my parents for sure feel lonely without us. And my dog... I don't know how much longer she can live (she's healthy now in case you wonder).. But I hope many more years to go. I still haven't find out whether she can swim or not. I want to find someday when we can bring her to the resort that allows pets to stay and play at the beach.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about my past, my childhood. How I wish I can go back and stay a child. I've always been a past person. I'm never a future-minded person..

Alright.. I should stop writing because I started crying and seems like couldn't stop lol. And I have to wake up after 3 hours and half later.