I'm having mixed feelings. I feel good because this is most probably the semester that I put most effort into. I feel confident before going into the exam hall.

I read all of the notes at least twice. Last time I only read once.

I tried to memorise EVERY small details. Because it seems like pharmacy students can't study smart. The lecturer likes to ask unexpected questions that makes us go like, "WTF is this? I thought this is not important? I thought the lecturer told us don't need to read?"

HOWEVER, I still can't get A. Why?? Why other people can memorise so well?? Every little detail also they can save in their memory! Like, the I,II,III,IV which is correct kind of questions, I always not sure about one option!!! And eventually I got it wrong! They got it right! Why?? Is it their techniques? Or are their brain cells better than mine? Well, maybe they really put more effort than me. Haiz...

I feel kinda sad now... because I found that I got ALL WRONG for a short answer question with three parts. I thought what I crapped might be able to get me some marks, maybe? But no, TOTALLY WRONG. Shyt. 10 marks gone. Moreover, the lecturer who's going to mark that particular question is well known for strict marking one zzz. No hope. I should have chosen the other question =.=

I'm so confused. Is this my limit? Or I haven't put in all my effort? Should I be so sensitive about results? Without a good result, I think I don't have any quality that can get me a job. Ughh, I rather born in my parents' generations. I'm even confused about what kind of life I want. Sometimes, I think a simple life would be very happy for me already because I don't want to make myself so tired and eventually lose my health but sometimes I don't want my life to be so dull without big achievements. It's all very confusing!!

Damn, the period cramp is quite disturbing today... I don't want to study for a while now. Drama time~


2 more subjects to go~! Gambateh! Hwaiting!